"Welcome To My Cave"

My so called family left this morning for a family cruise, i was excluded by my sister. She asked me last year to go knowing that i didn't have the money, she told me "Don't worry about it, just pay me back when your Workman's Comp. settlement comes". I found out in March that i was no longer included and that she had taken me off the list of guest in either January or Febuary, the only reason i found out this bit of information was because one morning i got so pissed off at her that i told her… Continue

I'm feeling a bit overwhelmed with everything that's happening in my life right now, for one thing i'm in a constant battle with Workmen's Comp., since April of this year i've been told that my claim have been accepted and i'm going to get paid, it is now the end of the year and i haven't gotten paid yet. My job have cut me off of my healthcare and life insurance, they have left me flying in the wind by myself, my family have just about abandoned me because i'm gay, they're no help at all. I ask… Continue

I feel so lost

This self imposed loneliness

This armor around my heart

This brick fence i've built

To protect myself from hurt and pain

Longs to be broken

But i'm so afraid

To let anyone in

Of getting too close

Of letting someone love me

Of loving someone

But not loving someone

Not letting anyone love me

Is perhaps worst

Than being alone

It still cause hurt and pain

In my self impos

… Continue

I don't proclaim to be perfect

I'm far from it

But you can't seem to realize

That i have flaws

You only see the outside cover

And not take the time to get to know the "Real" me

I'm damaged goods

The product of an abusive childhood

That's left it's mark on me

And makes me question my existence

I have insecurities

That i work very hard to hide

Instead i choose to show

The good things i have to offer

… Continue